At It Begins Within- Developing Leaders, we understand that it's often what's going on inside of us, what counselors call our psychological barriers, that keep us from reaching our full potential. No matter how hard we try, unless we recognize and address these barriers, our success and growth will be capped. One of the most common barriers is the stories our minds create.

The reality is our minds are meaning-making machines. Something happens, we experience feelings and emotions, and then our brain constructs a story based on how it interprets that experience. Our minds subconsciously work through this process almost instantaneously.

And then what happens? We react. We act without taking the time to reflect, in a way that may or may not align with our values and the kind of person we want to be.

I remember when a customer questioned the fairness of my pricing structure. She accused me of taking advantage of her and other clients by charging too much. I felt my body temperature rise, everything tensed up, and my facial expression turned from one reflecting a calm attitude to one of great anger and frustration. I thought to myself, “How dare she question my integrity like that? Obviously, she's clueless and has no idea what it's like to be a small business owner.”

I was absolutely tempted to react by calling her a jerk. But I didn't. Why didn't I? It would have felt so satisfying in the moment.

I didn't because I chose to tell myself a different story about why she asked those questions. My new story was this. “I can understand why she reacted to my prices. They are higher than most people expect them to be. Perhaps she was feeling the stress of that higher cost and was passing that anxiety on to me. I don't need to be defensive. I know the kind of excellent work I do and that my prices are reasonable.”

Because of this story I told myself, I was able to remain calm, listen carefully to her concerns, stay firm on my prices, and move forward without a lot of unneeded anxiety. The stories we tell ourselves are powerful.

By learning to choose better, more helpful ones, we can break free from what holds us back and lead with purpose. At It Begins Within, we help you develop this critical skill so that you can step into your full potential.